I find it really hard to get started on this last assignment of the semester. I have left my search for meaning behind. I have moved on, I think. I have got a good conversation going with one of the people I most enjoy speaking with. I am enjoying romantic daydreams again. Both very specific and then not at all. They explore mood/atmosphere rather than action. They are summer-dreams, a warm summer with no wind. Evenings. Company, music. Slightly drunk, or maybe just dehydrated – in the best of ways. A small gathering of friends and family. No one shouting. Everyone just having nice, calm conversations. A coherent group while still breaking up into parts every now and then, small side-conversations walking around in a big garden. Apple trees. Tightly grown – not too many wide open spaces. Colored lamps when the Sun starts to set. Red, green, yellow, purple, orange. I even see children. I think I am dreaming of my life some 5 years from now; how I want it to be.
Yes. I can see the people now.
I always write something entirely fictional or something that has happened in my own life. I have never tried to write about my future before. I should do that. I think that can open up some possibilities. I really would like to write something very dream-like. I am talking a lot about dreams these days. They are such a big part of our lives, we have to do something with them. We have to learn from them – I don’t intend to mean that we have to analyze them, just take them in. Feel them. I often learn a lot from my dreams when I just feel them. Feel the mood they present, feel what they did to me; how they made me feel, now and in that exact moment when I was in the dream. It’s important to remember not the flight, but the moment just before. The moment that made you fly. It’s good to remember the joy, but if you can’t recall how you got there, you will only ever have the memory of it instead of being able to recreate it.